Being happy does n’t mean that everything is perfect.
It means that you have decided to look beyond the
Being happy with what you have, that is the core of happiness. When you can let go, when you can stop judging, when you can stop focusing on the imperfections, you can begin to let yourself be happy. And isn’t that kind of important in your life, being happy?
Happiness begins when you let go. When you allow life to happen, instead of trying to control it, you begin to become free. In that freedom, it is so much easier to find happiness than it is when you try to force things. So relax, and allow life to have it’s little imperfections.
If you are constantly striving for perfection, you’re doing more than most. However, if you’re expecting perfection, you will likely be miserable, as few things are ever even remotely close to perfect. At least that’s how it has been in my life. How about yours?
It’s easy in this fast paced life of ours to get all wrapped up in everything that has to happen, and all that needs to be accomplished. It is also easy to get overly concerned with perfection. Yes, we all want to do our best work, but none of us are perfect.
How often do we get upset because something didn’t work out exactly the way we wanted? Even if the result was fairly close, we get upset. Upset usually leads to discontent, which then takes us to unhappy. Imperfect equals unhappy? Does that sound like a great way to live your life?
Imperfect is part of life. It is part of humanity. It is all around us, and it is within us. Trying to force perfection, or to expect it to occur in this lifetime, that’s just not very realistic, is it? While we might strive to achieve more, understand that we will fall short far too often.
In what parts of your life do you expect perfection? Do you expect it of your kids, your employees, or anyone else who reports to you in some way, shape, or form? How welcome do you think they consider a call to come to your office?
Are they expecting some kind words for what they did do well, or will it be a litany of their shortcomings? While some employees may respond well to that method of treatment, I have not found it to work very will with anyone, from kids to co-workers, to friends. How about you, have you seen it work well?
With children, dogs, and in teaching situations of all ages, it’s referred to as shaping or sometimes as “rewarding approximate behavior.” You cite the areas where things went well, and provide some kind of reward. Praise, cookies, treats or something of that nature usually works fairly well.
It also seems to help if you can come up with more good things than bad things. This helps you cease being the bearer of bad tidings, and start being considered the bearer of good tidings. A trip to your office, or being called out by name is no longer the end of the world.
How much better would his day be going if he could just take it easy and let things be imperfect? Yes, the team was supposed to be better, and there were plenty of times where the players could have been more precise in their execution. But stressing over it isn’t the way to go, in my opinion.
A number of years ago, a close friend was getting married. Everything was going well, until someone noticed that the florist had yet to deliver the flowers. A quick call confirmed the worst fears. The florist forgot all about the wedding.
The best man came up with a possible solution. The adjoining field was full of Queen Anne’s lace. After consulting with the bride, the idea was given the OK, and we went out picking flowers. The big ones went in the lapels of the groomsmen, and a bouquet was assembled with the remainder.
While it wasn’t optimal, it was a workable solution. They didn’t stress over it, they went with the little imperfections life threw their way. They took it easy, found a solution, and moved forward. It was a happy day, and is still a fond memory.
What in your life is causing you stress? What can you do to let go of some of that stress? What can you do to stop putting perfection between you and happiness? Even if it’s a small step, every little bit helps. Try something today, and see if you can’t get a little closer to happiness tonight.